The day I turn 23

is also the day you found out I'm blogging again.

Happy New Year!

The 'once in a while' therapy

It is so easy to get caught up in the daily life. In fact, if it was not the opportunity for a late night update of my résumé and having herbal tea to soothe the sore throat, this post would not exist and I, would be drifting away in bed.

It has been a long time since I stayed up late, on a quiet night, listening to soothing songs and let my thoughts find its way. Too much has happened and many experience gained. In no timely order, the things I have done/been through:

1. Attended a concert

2. Screaming down the street at 3am on a Wednesday morning

3. Got drunk and embarrassed myself silly

4. Explaining to everyone the ang moh in my life

5. Suffered sickness due to work induced stress

6. Got promoted for a mere 1k, and wished I had not

7. Booked tickets to go home

8. Meeting all sorts of people every Monday

9. Cycling to work

10. Love, loved and forgiven

Life is settling. Sometimes I wished for more, at times I wished for less. The only thing I hope remains constant - that everyday, somehow in its twisted way, I have learned something and it has changed my life.

The seam and the hem - that sounds like the kind of life I've been living so far.

xx.

Dear Diary

I left you.

It wasn’t hard the deed itself to be honest. I was too content so I seek excitement. It isn’t hard to be fooled, it isn’t hard to give up, and it isn’t hard to pursue wishful thinking.

But I left you.

There are days when I look back and I smile. Certain days I sigh. I can’t quite make out what I am supposed to feel. Emotions could be incredibly subjective. Is this normal or is this abnormal? Is this what I chose right, or was it wrong?

I do not want to start another rally. Our lives are not a race, our days are not numbered but I feel empty not having you beside. Why do I feel left out?

I miss you.

But I no longer pine for your presence nor do I pine for your absence.

I’ve learnt to finally loving you afar, and I still love you with all my heart.

Dedicated to all of you

It isn't just about the glass. There's so much more.

Just like that I have posted 420 posts in a span of 2 and a half years. Time moving so fast, I wonder if I don't jot down my thoughts, will I still remember myself in ten year's time?

Yesterday one of my badminton partners came to the pharmacy. As the season ended, we didn't really kept much in contact. He always have been a daddy figure to me, and we were great partners on the court. I was talking to him gleefully before he told me the worst news I would have imagined. He used to tell me to visit his son who is in Berlin, but I guess I wouldn't have the chance to do so now. His son passed away and it was a terrible tragedy. His son was at a rooftop party, got drunk and accidentally fell down.

You always think matters like this happen to someone else, but it's in your inner circle closer than you thought. That is what that has been in my life nowadays. People with diseases, people who died, people who are hospitalised, there is nothing that could sound worse to my ears.

I've been deciding lately and I think this blog has come to an end. I no longer want to voice my thoughts here anymore but we shall see where I head to somewhere in the future. It's great knowing each and everyone who hopped to my blog once in a while to spread some cheer. I thank you.

Everyone moves on to a better place; so am I.

Don't worry, today I'm no longer alone. I've been swept off my feet and I hope it'll last. We shall see as I enjoy this time in life. God bless everyone and may love keep you alive. I won't bid adieu, because it won't be.

:)

Do you want to fix me?

Life is still the same, but it's different. Doesn't make sense does it?

I called home today. My dad told me last month he was hospitalised. He had a tumour removed in his bladder. No one told me because I was preparing for my exam. The tumour was detected in the early stage, he doesn't even need chemo or radiotherapy but I'm getting paranoid now. I think I feel angry because I was kept in the dark. He still needs regular check-ups, hopefully everything would be okay.

You could know each other for five years and not know each other, or you could know each other for a week and felt like you've known each other for a long, long time. We got really close in the recent months. You know the gut feeling? I'm scared.

My exam wasn't exactly easy but I hope all goes well. Everything in its course in 3 week's time. I'm not looking forward to work tomorrow. Life can be ordinary, yet extraordinary in a day.

I'm fixin' it.